Friday, March 28, 2008

Don't Do These Things

1. Don't eat rocks.
2. Don't take naps in the road.
3. Don't stoke fires with your fingers.
4. Don't throw a brick straight up.
5. Don't breathe car exhaust.
6. If you ever meet the President, don't offer him the surprise gift of a firearm by whipping it suddenly out of your coat pocket.
7. For all pertinent tasks, use a hammer, not your fist.
8. Walk around toxic waste dumps, not through them.
9. Don't stargaze with friends on a hilltop in a thunderstorm and use metal fishing rods as pointers.
10. The stuff on the bottom of your shoe is not for internal consumption.

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