Monday, March 10, 2008

Things you never hear in church

1. Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew!
2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over.
3. Personally I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf.
4. I've decided to give our church the $500 I used to give TV evangelists.
5. I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the Junior High Sunday School class.
6. I love it when we sing hymns we've never heard before!
7. Since we're all here, let's start the service early.
8. Pastor, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas.

6 comments:

Jennifer Kirby said...

Did you make those up? They're funny!

Amanda said...

I just got them in an email. I could probably think of some though!!

Jennifer Kirby said...

From personal experience.

Jennifer Kirby said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

How about:

The offering (collection) was so good we won't need to pass the plate again until May.

The temperature is always comfortable.

Please let me sit in front of the family with 6 children all under the age of eight.

Then my all time favorite - Can Gail sing a solo?

Amanda said...

Those are great Gail!!